"I Have Found the One Whom My Soul Loves."

 

"I have found the one whom my soul loves." Song of Solomon 3:4

My intention is not to tell Susan's life story. God willing I will do that soon. I just want to share something of who she was and what drew me to her.

* * * * * * * * *

More than sixty years ago I met a girl.  For the first time ever on a church sponsored hay-ride I actually noticed a young girl named Susan.  She was 13 going on 14 and sitting on a row of hay bales with some friends. It was cold and that row of girls were sharing blanket with their eyes peering over the top and their legs dangling from beneath the bottom. 

I was 14 going on 15 and sitting at the other end of that straw strewn trailer with a group of boys. In those day boys and girl were kept separate at church functions. As I sat there looking at those legs dangling from beneath that blanket I settled my gaze on a pair right in the middle of the group. I thought, “Wow, those are some good looking legs” and with that thought in my mind I raised my gaze to see to whom they belonged. That’s when our eyes met and she gave a smirky smile.  It was almost like she knew I was looking at her though later she would say she didn't. As I looked into those clear blue eyes I thought, “Those are the kindest eyes I have ever seen.” I punched my friend and said, “I don’t know how or when but that girl is going to be in my life some day.”  

Well by the time we were both 15 we were a steady item. Neither of us ever dated another person. During this time I answered the call to preach. When I did she said it was about time. Seems she knew God was calling me to preach before I did.

We graduated from separate high schools in 1965 and I attended a year of college. Then on December 23, 1966 we became husband and wife in a ceremony at our home church . . .  The Boulevard Baptist in Pasadena, Texas.

On that cold December night Susan Eileen Warren became the “wife of my youth.”  For more than 54 years this godly woman has stood beside me. She has loved me, forgiven me, supported me, encouraged me, wept with me, bore my children and laughed both at me and with me. She has shared the load in times of enormous pain and heartbreak and has been with me as we celebrated times of great joy. We traveled the world in  ministry, business and pleasure. We did it all together. 

We were just kids (19 years old) when we got married so we grew up figuring out life together. Our Heavenly Father has been faithful to us and I thank Him for the "wife of my youth" who became the wife of my old age. In many ways I still see her through the eyes of that 19 year old boy.  We may have grown old together but she is forever young in my heart and mind. At the time we married I thought no one could love another person like I loved her and she me but after more than 54 years of marriage I must confess our love for each other is deeper than I ever thought two people could have. 

Susan became the beat of my heart and the breath in my lungs as well as the wind beneath my wings. I became the same for her and as she would tell me "her rock."  We would often clasp and and say to one another, "Stronger together."  Each night as we lay in bed she would whisper, "I love you and I don't know what I would do without you."  I'd reply, "I love you too and I do not want to ever be without you." Some times I'd say, "I love you too now lets go to sleep."

I earlier mentioned Susan’s kind eyes catching my attention. I would learn that the kindness in her eyes was merely the radiation from her heart. Susan was the authentically kind by nature. She always saw the good in people and had an uncanny way of putting people at ease. One CEO of a large travel company once told me, "Your wife is the easiest person with whom to talk I have ever known . . . she seems genuinely interested."  I said, "She seems that way because she is." She was accepting and non-judgmental and wanted everyone to be happy. 

Over time we proved to be complimentary personalities. We were not opposites and we were not the same but she made up where I was lacking . . . .  we completed one another and achieved in our lifetime the oneness that the Bible speaks of for husbands and wife. We completed one another so that together we became a complete person.

Neither of us knew that December night when we promised to love, cherish, honor, protect and care for until God calls us home where our steps would take us. We knew that it was a commitment as binding on our hearts in hard times as in good times; in sickness as in health; when we had nothing and when we gained wealth. Our goal was to become one in the Lord and by God's grace I believe we achieved that goal. 

Over time we came to believe that when God formed us in our respective mother’s wombs He had destined us to be together. To be one in Christ as a marital unit was our destiny and we enthusiastically embraced it and God made it so.

I have often said of Susan that she is not a example of the Proverbs 31 woman but instead said that she is that woman. She magnified her husband (that would be me) and she nurtured her children who numbered four. I can tell you now her children praise her.  Truth is, all she ever aspired to be was a wife and mother. In the process of doing that she became so much more. 

We started our journey as children in many way. No better sense than to just believe God would supply our needs and supply our needs He did. He allowed us to do everything together. I suppose that is because He knew that separate we would flounder. I will not try and divulge all the ways that God has led us as we make our journey to the promised land but suffice it to say we lived a blessed life.

Susan was kind, generous and just plain sweet by nature. Little things brought her joy . . . . you didn't have to do much to make her happy --- she was happy by nature. We couldn't even have one of those husband/wife arguments in which others engage . . . . she just refused to play. Nothing confounded her more than people not being able to get along with each other. She intuitively knew that happiness is a choice and wondered why so many people didn't choose to be happy. She was the tool that the Holy Spirit used to tame my temper.

But in the last three years of her life as she confronted all manner of health challenges she demonstrated a strength of character that not many people can match. I watched in awe as she confronted a brain bleed that affected her speech, a fall that destroyed her teeth; and pancreatic cancer which robbed her health and gave her excruciating pain that medication could not assuage. I can still hear her saying as she could barely move because of he pain . . . . “I can do this.” and so she did. Then during her heroic battle against the cancer a second stroke left her motionless and unable to speak or swallow. It marked the end of her battle. 

Then, on May 30, 2021the wife of my youth whom my soul loves was called home. We had walked hand in hand with Jesus for all these years. They were for the most part wonderful years. Then we walked hand in hand to the Gates of Heaven. All the while she never took her gaze from me or loosened my hand until we reached a place on the path beyond which I could not go. It was then that she turn her eyes from me and looked past me; loosed my hand to take another and she walked on without me but with her Lord . . . . . I now knew she was safe.

No man ever loved a woman more than I love Susan Eileen Warren Appleby. I love her still and her departure has left me with a large emptiness in my Spirit and in my Soul. I miss her more than language can communicate. We truly are one in the Lord. Our spirits and souls are interwoven and one day God will restore me to wholeness. For the Christian husband and wife who have loved deeply the parting at death while only temporary is in fact sweet sorrow. But, . . . .

There will be a happy meeting in Heaven, I know

When we see the many loved ones we've known here below

Gathered on that blessed hilltop with hearts all aglow

That will be a glad reunion day.

A glad day, a wonderful day,

A glad day, a glorious day

There with all the holy angels and loved ones to stay

That will be a glad reunion day.

When we live a million years in that wonderful place

Basking in the love of Jesus, beholding His face

It will seem but just a moment of praising His grace

That will be a glad reunion day.

A glad day, a wonderful day,

A glad day, a glorious day

There with all the holy angels and loved ones to stay

That will be a glad reunion day.

Christians may be Paranoid But It Is With Good Reason

Don't tell me there is no attack on the church o that the persecution of Christians is an ancient practice that no longer exists. Christians have been persecuted since the day that Jesus ascended to the Father. Indeed, Jesus himself was crucified. All but one of the Apostles died as martyrs for the faith. Persecution of Christians has never stopped. The source, form and the intensity of that persecution may vary from place to place and generation to generation but it has never gone away. It is happening somewhere in the world as I write.

Worldwide persecution is clearly seen by those who would but look. Turkey, Iran, China and the Sudan are two of he more notorious persecutors of Christians. Radical Muslim organizations are murdering Christians. These international persecutions are increasing daily.

However, this is not these are not he only places Christians are persecuted nor are they they only means of persecution being endured by God's people  Every day I read of a new attack here in the good old USA of some Christian organization enduring persecution. Christian infrastructure is being over burdened by states that forbid Christians from gathering as commanded by Scripture. Christians are being denied the right to carry their faith outside their church property. Christians are being marginalized politically and economically. 

Unfortunately, persecution against Christians in the United States is not something that is avoidable. It is something that we Christians will have to deal with and understand going forward.

These attacks come from many sources.  As believers we are not surprised by the criticism from non-believers.  We are accustomed to being attacked by those outside of the household of faith. Indeed we know that they will find the Christian faith hard to accept and understand. These critics and adversaries do not surprise us nor do we fear them.  They in fact are the very people to whom we are called upon to "preach the Gospel."

However, there are two sources that do surprise me. One is our own governmental jurisdictions. The leadership of our various governmental institutions in some twisted understanding of the First Amendment to the constitution are removing all Christian symbols and statements from those institutions. The House of Representatives under the leadership of Nancy Pelosi has removed many references to God and the Ten Commandments as well as the "under God" in the Pledge of Allegiance as used in the House of Representatives.

Courts have variously ruled in favor of atheist and attempted to removed prayer from school gatherings including but not limited to extracurricular activity such as weekend sports events and clubs made up of students. Some have gone so far as to forbid students and/or teachers from wearing religious jewelry such as a necklace with a cross. 

The courts, including the Supreme Court, have  either wittingly or unwittingly slowly but systematically been removing religion and religious people from the public square. They have ordered Christian who own businesses to leave their religion at their business door forcing them to do things that they believe is a violation of their faith group beliefs

The other is organizations formed by “so called” Christian people.  These are quasi religious groups that purport to be defending the faith.  Groups like Freedom America and The Baptist Joint Committee (BJC) claim to be champion the Christian faith when in reality they are attacking the very structure of the church in our nation.

Sadly, most of this governmental activity against the Christian faith has come at the insistence of pseudo-Christian groups. Groups like "Faithful America" run by an Episcopalian priest and The Baptist Joint Committee of Public Affairs (JPC) and it’s strawman war against the phony notion of Christian Nationalism and others.

Do not be deceived . . . . . they are not. Jesus warned of this. Remember he said, "They come to you in sheep's clothing, but inwardly they are ferocious wolves."  They seek to destroy what they can and distort what they cannot destroy.  It is the Good Shepard seeks to protect and warn his sheep from these imposters. Be vigilant and be discerning.

Jesus warned us of this when before he ascended to the Father he said to his disciples, "Take heed therefore unto yourselves, and to all the flock, over the which the Holy Ghost hath made you overseers, to feed the church of God, which he hath purchased with his own blood.  For I know this, that after my departing shall grievous wolves enter in among you, not sparing the flock.  Also of your own selves shall men arise, speaking perverse things, to draw away disciples after them.  Therefore watch, and remember, that by the space of three years I ceased not to warn every one night and day with tears.  And now, brethren, I commend you to God, and to the word of his grace, which is able to build you up, and to give you an inheritance among all them which are sanctified." Acts 20:28-32

Organizations like "Faithful America" fall into the category of dangers of which Jesus was speaking in that discourse. They all use in some form Satan's approach when deceiving Eve "Did God really say? except today his emissaries word the deception this way, "I Know that's what the Scripture says but , . .  ."

I was recently told by someone who identifies as a Methodist Christian that I needed to put down that "old book" (speaking of the Bible) and get in the real world. I are not what they slight of hand is their goal is to so culturize the Christian faith o that even the Lord Himself would not recognize it. On a personal level they do this to rid themselves of the stigma of engaging in what Scripture prohibits and what it defines as an abomination to God.  It is some kind of crazy logic that thinks that by simply denying removing something from Scripture or the liturgy it changes something. The actions of men do not have the power to alter what God thinks about anything. What was sin in Paul's day is sin in our day. We may change but God does not. We can label it and define it any way we choose but it is still sin and sin is an offense to God. God and is word change not.

I had a fiend who is now with the Lord with whom I loved to give some challenging theological or ethical question question. She would try and explain it and find herself going in circles. She would finally just say; "I just believe what the Bible says"  My friends that is what we need across the board in contemporary Christianity. There is an old saying used in a previous generation that said of the Bible, "God said it, I believe it and that settles it." Sounds good but it is wrong. The correct response should be, "God said it and that settles it."

Finally, my brethren, be strong in the Lord, and in the power of his might. Put on the whole armor of God, that ye may be able to stand against the wiles of the devil. For we wrestle not against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this world, against spiritual wickedness in high places. Wherefore take unto you the whole armor of God, that ye may be able to withstand in the evil day, and having done all, to stand.

The Kingdom of God & The Kingdom of Men & "Christian Nationalism"

During the past several months,  I have commented on Facebook about a thing called "Christian Nationalism." There has been much talk and concern expressed on the Internet regarding  Christian Nationalism. The Baptist Joint Committee (BJCPA) seem to have gone to seed on the subject. 

The academic definition of Christian nationalism is Christianity affiliated religious nationalism. Christian nationalists primarily focus on internal politics, such as passing laws that reflect their view of Christianity and its role in political and social life.  This is the real definition. However, the BJCPA would have you believe that any definition of Christian Nationalism should include the creation of a theocracy through legislation. 

Jeremie Beller defines Christian Nationalism as "the intertwining of the Kingdom of God with the kingdoms of men."  Tanya Brice says, "It is a form of civil religion that places one’s earthly citizenship above one’s obligation as a follower of Christ."

However, I contend that the term “Christian Nationalism” is at best a misnomer and at worst a deliberate straw man to allow left leaning “Christians” to attack conservative Christians under the cover of exposing them as what academics have labeled Christian Nationalism.

Before I delve into this I want to make it abundantly clear that not everyone who self-identifies as a Christian is in fact a true Christian. Many of these people simply operate in organizations that were either created by Christian people or chartered by Christian bodies such as the Southern Baptist Convention (SBC).

Let me concede up front that there are Christians and non-Christians who are Nationalist and there are Nationalist who are Christian and non-Christian. But the idea of Christian Nationalism is an academic construct (in lay terms a “strawman”) used by those who wish to attack Conservative (Traditional/Orthodox) Christians.  

“Christian Nationalism is an oxymoron in my mind. Christianity is one thing and Nationalism is another. There is no such thing as Christian Nationalism. If the Christian Nationalism construct were anything other than an academic creation by ceasing to be a Nationalist one would also cease to be a Christian. Instead what you get is a Christian who has denounced his Nationalism.

I also refuse to quibble over the fine line difference between Patriotism and Nationalism. I would use these terms thus: “I am a Christian who loves his country (National identity) and is committed to its well-being (a Patriot). In short interchangeably.

I am an American by birth and a Christian by a spiritual new birth and as both an American and Christian I would . . . . 

• Fight and die for my country to maintain its independence and borders in spite of its flaws. That makes me a Patriot not a Nationalist though the Nationalist might do the same.

• I also believe America is unique among the world’s nations in that from its inception God has had a unique plan for my country.  Christian principles lie beneath many of the founding fathers comments and establishment documents. 

• I believe in and support a strong military, secure borders, and the rule of law over the rule of men.

• I believe the laws of the land should be built upon the laws of Scripture (Holy Bible) and that standards of morality for the American culture should also be the Scripture (Holy Bible). The Judeo-Christian ethic informs most of our laws regarding behavior and relationships.

• I am pro-life and oppose abortion as a means of birth control.

• I believe that marriage is between a man and a woman and that gender is determined by biology, fixed at birth and is not a choice.

• I hold a Biblical world view which can be summed up as Eschatological Holy History and basically holds that from time to time God acts within history in such a way as to move history in a direction that it would not have gone had he not acted.

Government is not the ultimate authority for my life or the grantor of all might rights. Some rights are directly bestowed by God Himself and as our founders acknowledged these are things like living our lives in Liberty as we pursue a happy and content life for ourselves and our family.

These beliefs do not make me a “Christian nationalist.” They are what make me a Christian, a Patriot who is committed to the national life and integrity of my country.

Let me make it abundantly clear . . . . I am first, foremost, and above all a Christian.  Certainly I love my country and am committed to helping make her the greatest on Earth. However, my country comes somewhere behind my Savior and my family.  My first commitment is to Jesus Christ and His Kingdom. I am not wedded to any political party or to their programs, objectives and/or aspirations. 

Because I believe that the single most important thing in anyone’s life is not political liberty but spiritual liberty. I receive my marching orders from the commands of Jesus Christ. Those commands are global in nature. Jesus commanded that we “go into all the world.” I want all the people of my nation to know Jesus but I also want the rest of humanity to know that Jesus died for their sins and longs to forgive their sins and to give them eternal life.

To be sure I love my country, I want what is best for my country and what I judge best for the country is informed by my Christian faith and the Holy Scripture. I want my country to reflect as much as is humanly possible the moral and ethical values of the Kingdom of God.  Those values are found within the pages of the Holy Bible. That does not mean I want to create a theocracy.

Most of the recent concerns about Christian Nationalism comes from people on the political Left many of whom would self-identify as Cristian socialists. 

The Liberal mind operates out of a world view that sees many of the things the Orthodox and/or Evangelical Christianity. Biblical Christians, as I stated above, reject abortion on demand, gay marriage, gender confusion, etc. all of which are Liberal goals. 

So here is why I contend the very term “Christian Nationalism” is an academic straw man and oxymoron used to attack Conservative Christians:

• For a Christian the focus must be on the advancement of the Gospel. Nationalist focuses on the advancement of the politics of the nation.  I once heard a preacher friend respond in class to the question, "What is your name and what state are you from by saying, "My name is Mickey Scott and I was born in Texas but live in the state of grace." I identify myself with that remark. However, a citizen does not loose the benefits of their earthly citizenship because they are or become Christians. We are first and foremost citizens of the Kingdom of God which exists in but is not limited by this world and its kingdoms.

• The Christian faith produces loyalty to Christ. Nationalism produces loyalty to the nation above all else.

• The Christian faith produces people who are willing to die for the cause of Christ. Nationalism produces citizens who are willing to die for their nation.

• The Christian faith proclaims Jesus Christ and promotes his kingdom above all else. Nationalism raises the national flag above all else. The Kingdom of God is eternal while nations are temporary. The Kingdom of God exists within the Nation and is greater than the nation. The Nation is temporal and the Kingdom of God is spiritual. The "Kingdom of God is among you." Matthew 3:2

• The Christian faith promotes the interests of God Kingdom as revealed in Scripture. Nationalism promotes the interests of the nation above the Kingdom of God. My first allegiance is to Jesus Christ and no governmental entity, nation, politician or other person will take priority over him . . . . . . Ο Ιησούς δεν είναι ο Καίσαρας.

Beginning with the Prophets in the Old Testament, The Apostles and believers in the New Testament believers have declared the word of the Lord to the nations and their nation in particular. They spoke to the nation and its leadership not for it in their day and believers are obligated to do the same today.

That word sometime could bite and put the believer at risk. Believers have died by the thousands over the years and continue to do so in our day. Not for their government but for their Lord. As believers our job is to call people to repentance and faith knowing that if we are successful in that arena our nation will be a better place to live.

I do believe politics and economics are vital and that to some extent can and in my mind should represent biblical ethics.  However, I believe making disciples and seeing lives change will do more that all the political action we can take to bringing the nation into compliance with the requirements of God’s word on people. The Kingdom of God transcends all nations and ethnic identities.  When God called me to preach the Gospel I received the highest assignment possible as a child of God in the world and that is to preach the Gospel to the people of all nations. 

Although I am both willing to defend my neighbor and die for my nation I see that as a lessor thing than honoring Christ with my life and if called upon to die for His namesake and/or kingdom. I would argue that I am a better citizen not because I am willing to die for my nation, but because of my faith in God. 

We are called to walk in the ideals set forth in Holy Scripture if that happens to coincide with those of our nation then so much the better.  

I implore you as a believer in Jesus Christ to “seek ye first the kingdom of God, and his righteousness; and all these things shall be added unto you.”  

In Christ Alone

Stuart Townend

In Christ alone my hope is found,
He is my light, my strength, my song
This Cornerstone, this solid Ground
Firm through the fiercest drought and storm.
What heights of love, what depths of peace
When fears are stilled, when strivings cease
My Comforter, my All in All
Here in the love of Christ I stand.

In Christ alone! - who took on flesh,
Fullness of God in helpless babe.
This gift of love and righteousness,
Scorned by the ones He came to save
Till on that cross as Jesus died,
The wrath of God was satisfied
For every sin on Him was laid
Here in the death of Christ I live.

There in the ground His body lay,
Light of the world by darkness slain:
Then bursting forth in glorious day
Up from the grave He rose again
And as He stands in victory
Sin's curse has lost its grip on me,
For I am His and He is mine
Bought with the precious blood of Christ

No guilt in life, no fear in death,
This is the power of Christ in me
From life's first cry to final breath,
Jesus commands my destiny
No power of hell, no scheme of man,
Can ever pluck me from His hand
Till He returns or calls me home
Here in the power of Christ I'll stand.

Her Journey With Jesus Has Led To His Throne

 

Over the last year three of my friends from my earliest years have said farewell to their wives of many years. This week I learned a fourth friend, Bill Murphy, has said farewell to the wife of his youth after 50 years. This is poignant to me because my wife of 54 years is presently battling pancreatic cancer.

Susan and I knew Vicky had been sick but it didn’t seem to be anything serious. However, as time went by she became more and more ill. So in to the hospital she went so they could find out what was wrong and get her back up and running. We never knew she would walk in but be carried out. What I am saying is, we are shocked at the turn of events that led to her passing. I can honestly say, “Vicky’s passing was the farthest thing from my mind . . . to the point it was not even on my radar screen.

I remember the very day I met Vicky Murphy. We had a revival scheduled at Woodland Baptist Church and the singer we had scheduled canceled at the last minute. I couldn’t think of anyone we could get on such short notice. So, I asked our Minister of Music and Youth at the time, John Plumlee, if he knew of anyone. It wasn't long and he came back and said he knew of a guy named Bill Murphy who was a music evangelist. I told John to call him and make the arrangements to get him here.

On the day the revival was to begin at about 4:00 P.M. what shows up outside my office but this small over-used camper. It had hardly stopped when out jumped this tiny lady who ran up to me gave me a big hug and proclaimed, “We’re the Murphy’s and were here to do your music.” That was my introduction to Vicky Murphy.

What a journey that began. It was the beginning of a journey that would take us around the world preaching, teaching and singing the gospel. It was David & Susan and Bill & Vicky invading Australia a half dozen times or more. For a short time Bill was on our staff as our “Staff Evangelist.” From that he became pastor of the Gordon Street Baptist Church in Alvin (Just a short trip from our church) where he built a substantial work for the Lord. 

You say, "I hear, you, but what has that to do with Vicky?”  My answer is, “everything!” You see you need to understand that long before we met Bill and Vicky had made a commitment that theirs was a shared ministry just as Susan and I had done as we left for Seminary in 1969. That commitment to shared ministry and to their marriage relationship resulted in them becoming a living breathing example of the Biblical concept of  “Two becoming one” and she was a helpmate in the truest sense of the Hebrew meaning of “making up what is lacking.” 

They were wrapped up and tied up together and with Jesus in such a way as it is impossible for me to see one without seeing the other. Her story is fascinating and in some way spell binding. She was one of he least likely people to become who she became and accomplish what she accomplished that I have ever known. 

Her start was inauspicious . . . you’d never have picked her to amount to anything. Vicky had a bull dog tenacity about her that said, “Yes I can.” She created Bible Art and took it worldwide, she taught herself to play the piano, she taught herself sign language, she learned to sing harmony with Bill and eventually to step out on her own. I think in some way she actually dragged Bill along with her.

Vicky’s life became a message in and of itself. Truth is we are all messengers in how we confront life to those around us. She was a living breathing example of the “I can do that” spirit that made you believe that you to could do whatever it takes to live for Jesus.

Those of you who know me know that I am a theologian, philosopher and critical thinker. Well, Vicky was none of those. Vicky was what we wished everyone would become . . . she loved Jesus for loving her and she possessed a grateful heart and it showed. Yet, over time we became friends. I enjoyed throwing something out at her that I knew she didn’t believe (most cases neither did I) and watch her struggle for a response . . . . she virtually always had one . . .  But ultimately would say something like, I just believe the Bible. I just enjoyed her refreshing approach to life and faith that God would take care of whatever came along.

So, it wasn’t her life story that impressed me it was her friendship that touched us. I still remember them coming to us in one of the darkest hours of our lives and Vicky saying, “What can we do to help?” It was with those six words they blessed us more than anyone else had. That was Vicky. It was never a matter of saying something (though she never had a lack of something to say) for her . . . it was always “What can I do?”

I am sad that Vicky has left us for a far better place but I confess that while I am happy for her I am not happy. As long as we walk in this world Susan and I will miss her physical presence. Truthfully, we have been unable to speak of her without shedding a tear. I just thank the Lord that He brought this little wisp of a woman but giant in the Lord into our lives. Vicky, Susan and I already miss you; our hearts ache when we think of you; know that we love and miss you and that our tears are a mixed bag of what we have lost and you have gained. But alas, we find comfort in the promise of Scripture that the Same Lord who began a good work in us will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus" and one day we shall join you in His presence.

But I also shed a tear for my dear brother in Christ, Bill Murphy. Over the years he and Vicky as with Susan and myself became a living unit . . . . one flesh. 

Now Bill must begin discovering who Bill Murphy is without Vicky.  To be sure he will not be entirely without her. He will carry her in his heart and memories and there will days when he will feel her presence. But she will be gone from those thousands of little moments in a day. This is the experience in life that I fear the most. Will he get over Vicky’s passing? . . . . I think not, but I know that by the grace of God and the love of Jesus he will get though it. Will it be easy? No! How can it be easy when half of what has defined you for 50 years is now in another place. We are here for you my brother but more important Jesus is with you right now.

I like something the late Evangelist, Vance Havner, once said to Warren Wiersbe about his own wife's passing. First he said, "I have not lost her because I know where she is." Then he added: "She is in Heaven walking hand-in-hand with Jesus and I remain here walking hand-in-hand with Jesus so I guess you might say because of Jesus we are still walking together hand-in-hand." 

When Susan and I started our journey with the Lord as one of His called preachers our circle was relatively small. Over the years our circle enlarged as did our influence but now as we reach the end of that journey the circle is contracting at an ever increasing rate. 

BTU as I remember it

When I was a kid our church had a program we called  BTU.  BTU was an acronym for "Baptist Training Union."  Most churches had it on Sunday evening just prior to the evening worship service. It was general small groups divided by flexible age groupings.

I have to confess that I was not particularly fond of BTU but I was fond of one of the girls who attended regularly. I know that the leaders (in my case my aunt) tried so hard to make it a spiritual event but to my mind it was a romantic event. It was the only group in Baptist life in those days that was coed. 

The curriculum fell into three broad categories: Baptist Doctrine, Christian Ethics and Moral Values.  You could count on a quarterly studies that dealt with some aspect of what the Bible teaches on these subject areas.

The process for the group was pure genius. Instead of a teacher presenting the material and then having discussion the lesson were broken down in into parts. Usually four to five parts for each lesson. Each of these parts would be assigned on one Sunday evening to be presented on the next Sunday evening. The assignment were to the youth members class members who would study heir “part” and then present it at the appropriate time in the next meeting. 

I said this plan was genius and here is why. First, the assignment of parts insured that one student would get in-depth exposure to the subject under consideration. After all no one want to show up unprepared. 

More importantly, it served as a speaker training program. It gave youth exposure to being in front of a group and leading the group in part of the program. As important as being prepared was it was more important to physically get up before an audience and speak even if all you did was read the material from the book.  I can tell you now it was in BTU that I overcame my own anxiety of being in front of group and speaking.

BTU imploded when denominational and local leadership tried to make it something it was not designed to be . . . . a spiritual grown group. BTU as I said earlier was a Romantic organization by providing a wholesome coed social environment for youth to interact; it fostered leadership development; it instilled Christian doctrine, ethics and morals. As such, it was already developing youth with a strong spiritual core and integrating knowledge, morals and ability into that core.  The genius of BTU was that it strengthened the spiritual life of youth without trying to force it upon them. They just sort of caught it as the became competent leaders. 

I do not believe it is coincidental that it was during the days of BTU that many a youth in every Baptist church felt the call of God to full-time Christian ministry and many of theme became preachers, pastors and evangelists. 

Just as an interesting side note: I mentioned above that BTU was the only coed organization for Baptist youth during my growing up. Generally speaking that is true organizationally. However there were two other settings where youth could have a coed environment. One was the Youth Choir but that involved a modicum of musical talent or sound equipment skills. The other was worship services. Both were used by youth to be together.

It was also a day when parents actually enforced their rules for their teenage children. Rules like, no dating until you are sixteen (hence the sweet sixteen birthdays) and then it had to be double dating. We used to joke that the greatest evangelistic tool the church had was youth girls. Teenage boys in most cases had to come to church if they were going to see that one someone that made their heart beat faster. Many of these young men who came to be with a certain young lady girl found themselves exposed to the Gospel and became Christians themselves. I know a few who also became not only Christians but calling to preach the Gospel themselves.

Forsake Not the Assembly . . . .

I recently posted on my personal Facebook page a blurb about Christmas in which I said that Christmas 2020 just doesn’t seem like Christmas. What with the isolation of the Covid-19 Pandemic; virtually all of our social institutions being closed under the guise of preventing the spread of said virus; the lack o people in the stores; the absence of Christmas music and decorations in public areas; and, restrictions placed on travel and gatherings has robbed many of us of the things that reinforce the spirit of Christmas in our daily living. 

I spoke in my last posting about the fact that the governmental attempts at bringing the Covid-19 Pandemic under control has led to te systematic disassembling of the institutions in society that are essential for our social well-being. As humans we were created by God to be social in nature. We need places to assemble socially as much as we do food and drink. Churches, bars, restaurants, clubs etc did not grow out of an economic need but out of our need to “break bread together.”  

I am old enough to recall in my own extended family when the single most important event of the year

was the annual family gathering at Christmas. We celebrated the birth of our Lord Jesus but we were at the same time celebrating the importance and value of family and community. Now looking back over my 70 plus years I can see the gradual decline of our social structure and in the year 2020 the virtual dismantling of our social institutions rom the most secular to the exclusively religious and everything in-between. We now have governmental leaders not only ordering the closing of church and public businesses but also banning family gatherings. One has to wonder what is really driving these actions . . . .

From the very beginning when God created man God Himself observed that “It is not good for man to be alone.”  Here is something in community that allows for both the development and expression of our individuality. As surely as we live and breath we need community. We draw strength from one another. Someone long ago said it, “There is strength in numbers.” Even the military understands the concept of “overwhelming force.”  Perhaps that is why we are seeing all this ridiculous closings. If there is strength in numbers then it is also true that to win the day “one must divide and conquer” or control. As I see it that is precisely what is being done. 

These institutions are essential to the survival of a free and democratic society. I suspect that our own American Revolution was hatched in the pubs, churches and boarding houses of the colonies long before it reached the state houses. Those who support and enforce these draconian measures lie when they say it is in your best interest. It is in furtherance of their gaining absolute control of the nation and of your life.  

So, when the stores are empty, when the restaurants have no patrons, when the churches are empty of worshipers and yes, when the bars are closed we are weakened as individuals and as a society. Isolated means segregated . . . . separated into easily controlled units. If what I red is true this isolation is the occasion for a significant rise in suicide, divorce, elder abuse and violence of every kind.

How does this relate to Christmas you ask? Well, the Christmas season, both secular and sacred, is the most powerful community event of our culture. Oh, sure it has been, as the old time preachers warned, both commercialized and secularized far too much.  But in spite of this it still at every level screams hope for a better tomorrow. It celebrates light, life and renewal. It is truly a group celebration.  Shepherds came as a group and wise men traveled in a caravan. The child whose birth we celebrate would become known as the “Light of the World.” Gathering in His name became so essential to the health of individual Christians that the Apostle Paul warned against failure to assemble for fellowship, edification and service. 

What I am trying to say is: Not only is religious assembly a right it is a necessity and what is true for the church should also be true about so many of our institutions that allow us to gather for conversation, edification, and social interaction of all kinds.   

Use this year and its bogus isolation to determine to put an end to forced isolation and plan family events in 2021, support stores, churches, restaurants and other institutions that encourage socialization. Don’t let these traditions die. They are not just relics from the past they are necessary for a free, independent and democratic society to exist and thrive.

And finally lets put the joy of Christmas with all its lights, sounds, smells, joviality, worship, celebration, remembrance and hope for the future in full view. 

                                                                                                                                   

No, Never Alone

 WOW, that’s about all I can say about 2020. Well, that’s not exactly true but it does express my dominant emotional response to this past year. We’ve all faced unprecedented challenges and I’ll not detail them here. You have yours and I have mine. Suffice it to say not many of us have lived through a year like 2020.

I recently remarked to a friend that 2020 has been a revelatory year for me but I am still trying to find meaning in it all. Especially what a merciful God is saying to us through these difficult days. I know He has purpose in all this chaos . . . . . I am just having a hard time identifying it. 

We’ve all faced unprecedented challenges this year that we could have never imagined back on January 1, 2020.  I’ve discovered things about colleagues, friends, family and acquaintances that I never knew. I’ve had political fears and suspicions confirmed. More importantly I have discovered and in some cases rediscovered things about myself. Some of it has been positive and some of it, well, let’s just say some of it has been less than uplifting

I believe I could spend many a paragraph waxing eloquent about all the inconvenience, cost, loss and pain we have all suffered in 2020 but I’ll leave that to others. I’ll simply say that like so many others I have suffered loss in just about every aspect of life . . . . some permanent and other transitory. 

However, as I reflect on 2020 I have chosen to not focus so much on the negatives, and believe me, there are plenty of those. Family members have died as have dear friends who in any other year would still be with us. Assets have dwindled and income has slowed to a trickle.

Recognizing all that I suppose the thing that has impacted me the most in 2020 was the isolation. The outrageously and in my view counterproductive quarantining has probably killed more people, destroyed more marriages, caused more suicides and generated more anger than the pandemic that it was supposed to address. 

This enforced isolation and its effects has underscored for me the importance of relationships and connectivity, of humanity and kindness and of strength and resilience. These are things that have been seen time and again through the actions of my clients, colleagues, friends and family.

God did not create us to be alone. He created us to live in relationships. In fact, in Genesis 2:18 God Himself observes, “It is not good that the man should be alone.”  Isolation and aloneness breeds loneliness, melancholy and depression. I may not need you and you may not need me but we all need someone. 

We are social creatures and when deprived of social interaction we begin to die. I think often of my wife’s elderly aunt when told she would be isolated for her protection and to keep her alive. She responded, “This is not keeping me alive . . . . it is just a slow death and it certainly isn’t living.”

The loss of restaurants, bars, churches and a hundred other shut down businesses as “none essential” services is bogus. These institutions are essential to our humanity. These are the places where our social needs are met. Without them we begin to experience a steady decline in our humanity. Many of us, even the most isolationist of us, can go for short times without human contact. However, none of us can go for too long that way. Why do you think that “solitary confinement” in prisons is considered the worst kind of punishment. Many convicted sexual predators placed in isolation for their own safety end up committing suicide. 

To be clear, short periods of quarantining may be necessary and doable but long term isolation becomes counterproductive and even destructive. We were created by a merciful God in such a way as to make community an essential element in our well-being. 

One of the reasons, in my judgement, that social media has been such a major player this past year is that it provided us with a platform to form a false community. The need for human touch was being met without real touching. 

I suggest the following when this isolation/quarantining lunacy has past you involve yourself in some social group like a church or club of sum kind.

1. Become a part of and get involved with a spiritual/religious group or church. Nowhere can you experience community better than in a church. For Christians this is essential as Scripture warns against failure to live in community by failing to assemble as a body of believers. 

2. If you have an Alumni group (High School or College) get involved with the former student organizations.

3. Make an effort to bring together your extended family. This offers a terrific opportunity to build a community where both group and individual have significance.

4. Become involved in a civic club or political action group.

You should also keep in mind that socialization is the process of internalizing the norms and ideologies of society. It encompasses both learning and teaching and is thus "the means by which social and cultural continuity are attained."  Want to change the society then begin by breaking up the various social groups within that society/culture.

 You should also keep in mind that socialization is strongly connected to individual development especially as concerns what is proper behavior and what is not.

My point is, "Refuse to allow yourself to be severed from your community.”  Without you that community is diminished but more importantly you need community to remain vital emotionally and mentally. I want my friends to remain safe but I don’t want them, or me for that matter, to loose our ever loving minds.