Don’t Disparage of the Pain

When we love deeply and we love over many, many years and the person we have so loved is taken from us it causes us great inward pain. I suppose it is a shadow of the pain that Jesus experienced as he was separated from the Father when He "became sin" for us and died the sin death thus giving us both the hope and the means of redemption. 

Don’t disparage of the pain you feel when the love of your life dies. Believe me I do not make that statement lightly. It has been more than 25 months since the woman I love went to be with the Lord and not a day has gone by that I have not thought of her and hurt in my soul. 

For almost a year I tried to hide the depth of pain, but I found I could not and decided that I should not.  I suppose most of the people in my world and many outsides of my world know of my struggle. It has been the deepest and most sustained pain I have ever felt. The pain was so intense that it defied words. Her leaving was as if someone had ripped out a part of my own soul. It was as we used to say - "To the bone." 

When our beloved departs through death to a far country, and we are left behind with just the memories and the pain of that separation we wonder who can lift us from this pit. We may even question whether God cares or not. The hurt is so deep we find ourselves crying out with the Apostle Paul, “O wretched man that I am! Who will deliver me from this body of death?” 

Given all this still I say, do not disparage of that pain. It is the evidence that one has loved and been loved deeply. If you want to avoid the suffering that comes from such separation, then the price is never experiencing the joys of loving deeply and the marvel of two becoming one. It is also evidence that you had obtained the oneness that God intended. 

The pain is the price of the love and though the price, as in my case, is great it is but a small thing compared to the love that we enjoyed. I have come to understand the meaning of Paul's affirmation in Romans 8:18 where he writes, "the sufferings of this present time are not worthy to be compared with the glory that shall be revealed in us." No matter how great the love we shared here and no matter how great the pain we are presently experiencing the love and glory we experience when we join our loved one in Heaven will outshine it all. It will truly be worth it all when we see Jesus and are reunited with our beloved.   

No matter how great the pain it is but for a season. But love is made of stronger stuff. For the Christian, love is stronger than fear, life stronger than death, and is hope stronger than despair. We have to trust that the risk of loving deeply is always worth taking. It is a true saying that says, “It is better to have loved and lost than to never have loved at all.” 

One of my favorite passages of Scripture is I Corinthians 13:8-13. Paul makes it clear that everything will pass away. That is, everything will cease except Faith, Hope and Love. And, of what remains (Faith, Hope and Love) love is the greatest. But that only stands to reason since as First John 4:8 tells us, “God is love.” 

So, while the absence of the one we love is painful the promise of God’s love makes the pain bearable and “the sufferings of this present time are not worthy to be compared with the glory which shall be revealed in us.” (Romans 8:18). So, while I still carry a great deal of sorrow in me it is not debilitating because I carry a greater expectation that when I step out of time into eternity of being greeted by not only my Lord but also the many loved ones I’ve known here below and that includes my dear Susan with whom I became one.  

The bond of love will not be broken. Just as we cannot be separated from the love of God in Christ Jesus . . . . so the love we shared is not broken. It may have to be stretched across many years but one day, someday, face to face it will be refreshed. I personally believe that there is a better than even chance that when I get to heaven not only will a see Jesus, but I'll be greeted by those who I loved and loved me. I easily imagine Jesus telling Susan to show me around the place and the joy I experience as she takes my hand and says, "come walk with me, there is so much I want you to see. You see that's what love does.

Yep, that will be a happy day indeed. Sometimes in my mind I try and imagine what that reunion will be like. What a day that will when we enter heaven and experience for the first time ever life without sorrow, sadness or pain and see our beloved once more. There is so much more to be said here but no volume of words would add to the glory of that reunion.

There will be a happy meeting in Heaven, I know.
When we see the many loved ones, we've known here below.
Gathered on that blessed hilltop with hearts all aglow
That will be a glad reunion day.

A glad day, a wonderful day,
A glad day, a glorious day
There with all the holy angels and loved ones to stay
That will be a glad reunion day.

When we live a million years in that wonderful place
Basking in the love of Jesus, beholding His face

It will seem but just a moment of praising His grace.
That will be a glad reunion day.

A glad day, a wonderful day,
A glad day, a glorious day
There with all the holy angels and loved ones to stay.
That will be a glad reunion day.