Married 50 Years: And Still Loving It.

My sister has been having my blog printed in book form and sending me a copy of each book as it is completed. I actually started blogging back in 2009 and, as this missive proves, continues to this day. I understand that volume four is in some stage of production.

At any rate volume three arrived last week as Susan (my wife of 50+ years) read through it she noticed that I had not written anything in 2016 about our 50th Wedding Anniversary or the reception our children had in our honor.

When I came into the room she said, “I’ve been reading your blog entries.”  “Yea,” I said, “what do you think of them."   She replied, “Well, you have written about High School Reunions and just about everything under the sun but not a word about our 50th Anniversary or the reception the children gave for us.” I thought to myself, “uh-oh.” Implied in that statement was the question, “wasn’t it important enough to you to write about it?” I really had no answer that would satisfy her but I knew very soon I’d be writing this blog entry so I just said, “Well, the reception was not held until March 2017 . . . maybe you should start reading my blog online and not waiting on the printed book.” Boy, was that a dumb thing to say.

Now you have to understand that we were married on December 23, 1966. Also know that I had not forgotten that date or that December 23, 2016 marked our 50th wedding anniversary. Truth is, I knew she had her heart set on having a reception celebrating our 50 years as husband and wife and I did everything I could to encourage fulfilling her wish. It just wasn’t to be.  Schedules were just too full with holiday events to make it happen then. I will also set forth in my defense the fact that we had mini 50th Wedding Anniversary events all throughout 2016 including a December 7 day cruise.

Fortunately for me one of our daughters pointed out that they (our children) would get together, set a date and make a plan. Those of you who know Susan personally know that she is likes to know all the details about everything. She doesn’t mind surprises as long as she knows about them in advance. As one of daughters told her, “Mom, don’t worry, we’ll take care of everything. It will all be good.

Well, the e-mails, text messages and phone calls flew back and forth as the planning was taking shape. A date was chosen and a plan came together that resulted in Sunday March 5, 2017 being “D-Day” for the reception. With that the count down clock was started.

 About the only part I played was giving them my mailing list to work off of for sending invitations.

Then, when given the green light, I sent out a personal  email invitation to just about everyone I know just in case the children had missed someone. Truth is, our children have no idea how many people we know both socially and in other ways . . . I can assure you it is a lot more than they think.

The only thing I insisted on was that the invitation let people know that we did not want any gifts.

What we wanted was their presence. However, if they do want to make a gift please make it to our favorite Charity . . . . Mission Dignity. I am happy to say that those who chose to give, their gifts when taken together, made a very healthy donation to that project.  It is the only charity that I support these days.

I’d love to tell the story of all that planning but the truth is I don’t know anything about it except that that in the end it turned out to be a perfect day for us.
 
So, I’ll reiterate on Sunday, March 5th of this year (2017) our children honored us with a Fiftieth

Wedding Anniversary Reception. It was held at our daughter, Charity’s home in Pearland, Texas. We got up Sunday morning and the house was literally converted to a reception area. Tables for people to use as they enjoyed the buffet were strategically placed so that folks could visit. A “this has been our life” video was playing as loop. Susan’s wedding dress (which still fits) was on display as were photos and other memorabilia. In the end it turned out to be a perfect day for us.

Like the tables and chairs we were stationed at the front door to greet guests as they arrived and our youngest daughter, Stacie, served as photographer and took pictures of us with our friends as they arrived.

During the lulls between people arriving I, as did Susan, visited with our friends from over the

years and introducing them to each other.  There were people in attendance from every church we ever pastored except the very first one. It was interesting to listen as they shared with each other their memories of our ministries together. It was gratifying as they shared with us their gratitude and affection.

Additionally we had all of our children and grandchildren present and I can tell you that nothing . . . absolutely nothing . . . brings Susan and I more joy than having all our family present. So I have say all in all the reception was a huge success and we are appreciative of all the thought, energy and expense that our children went to in making it a special day for us.

What I loved about the event was:  My children put it all together; Susan and I were able to share it together; and, it allowed us to get a glimpse of the Tapestry God has created of our lives from the time we were naive young lovers through all the stages of our life together and where we are today.

However, in addition to being special for all the reasons I have mentioned it was even more special as a time where we reflected on our life journey. A few weeks ago Susan and I went to see a play written by Judy Norton of The Walton’s fame She played the part of Mary Ellen in the series. The play, titled Moments Remembered: The Lives and Loves Lily and Daniel Grant. Judy not only wrote the play she stared in it with Don Most. You’ll remember Don from the series Happy Days in which he played Ralph Malph
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The play is about the life stages of a married couple beginning from their first date through Lily’s death. Well, that is sort of what our 50th Wedding Anniversary was for us . . . except for the death part and we have given that some thought as well. It was for us a time of remembrance.

Remembering how we met and our dating all through high school. For details you’ll have to read my book but suffice it to say we were flooded with memories of being young and in love at an early age. There was never any question in our minds or in the minds of those who knew us in those days that we were meant to be together. Over time I have come to understand that it was without question a God thing.  Amazingly as a 16 year old I couldn’t imagine Susan not being in my life and now at the age of 70 I feel it even stronger though I know that for one of us it will one day happen. One of us is in for a whole new experience unlike any we’ve had thus far. It is an inherent part of the cycle of life as ordained by God . . . though it makes me sad to think about it.

Every photograph and every person who came through the door at our daughter’s house was a peg upon which many precious remembered moments were hanging. I couldn’t help but think of the old NBC television program, This is Your Life. On this program, the host would surprise guests and then take them through a retrospective of their lives that included appearances by colleagues, friends, and family. Every time the door opened a new group of life moments were remembered.

In the play, Moments Remembered, they hit all the biggies: dating, marriage, careers, children losses and gains, and aging.  At our 50th Wedding Reception we also hit all the biggies as well as a whole lot of not quiet biggies but still very significant life moments. Susan and I have done a lot of living; we have received a lot of blessing; and, suffered our share of hardship and pain. All of this has drawn us closer to one another.

Our lives have been touched by wonderful people from around the world. We have had moments with the some of the great personalities of our time as well as the not so great. All of them have shaped who we are. This is where I should drop a few names but I will restrain myself. Again, you’ll have to read the book. We have traveled extensively visiting many cultures and seeing, as Howard Carter said when he looked into Tut’s tomb, “many wonderful things.” But the really wonderful part is we saw them together.

Life is too short for a love such as ours.  Ours has been a good life and one of the good things is that we have a few more chapters to write. With God’s help and by His grace we’ll continue to write them together. 

My feelings may well be summed up in the words of Nicolas Spark who wrote in The Notebook . . . “I am nothing special, of this I am sure. I am a common man with common thoughts and I’ve led a common life. There are no monuments dedicated to me and my name will soon be forgotten, but I’ve loved another with all my heart and soul, and to me, this has always been enough.” And yes, “I think our love can do anything we want it to."